These aren't the droids you're looking for.

Game Time

Posted in Australia, Awesome, Buddies, Holidays, Humor, Insanity, Nasty, Oddities, Plugs, Poetry, Rasputin on December 31st, 2009 by Atlas Cerise

Afishionados,

Game Time

Click to Embiggen

What are you waiting for? COME RHYME and BE LONG!

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Wand Wranglers

Posted in Bullshit, Duh, Humor, Movies, Observations on December 29th, 2009 by Atlas Cerise

Afishionados,

Albus Dumbledore

He'll give you hogwarts

Albus Dumbledore is the Headmaster at Hogwarts School of Witchcraft and Wizardry from the Harry Potter books. He’s a wizard, Order of Merlin First Class. He’s also gay.

Gandalf the White

Gandalf the White doesn't care about Labor Day

This is Gandalf the White from The Lord of the Rings. He’s played by the actor Ian McKellan. Ian is, in fact, not a wizard at all. But he is a homosexual.

Grand Wizard

Ain't NASCAR just grand?

This is a redneck. He thinks the Grand Wizard is a swell guy. I wonder if he’s aware of the pattern I’ve discovered among wizards…

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Christmas Eve

Posted in Duh, Holidays, Hot Babes, Humor on December 24th, 2009 by Atlas Cerise

Afishionados,

Hey, whaddya know?

Christmas Eve

Christmas Eve

It’s Christmas Eve.

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Happy Holidaze

Posted in Bullshit, Family, Holidays, Humor, Nasty, Observations, Oddities, Pets on December 20th, 2009 by Atlas Cerise

Afishionados,

Christmas time must be here, because the family has been arriving throughout the day (and night). The half of the family that is already here has been scurrying and cleaning for hours now. Doc has been hard at work, tackling the ongoing battle that is the cat litter box. A neat-freak whose pedantry rivals event the best, Doc not only scrubs the shitbox out, but filters and sifts for the tiniest of cat nuggets in much the same way as one might pan for gold. Like Jane Goodall among the apes, I observe from the sidelines and, as best as I can tell, the ultimate goal is to remove even the most miniscule of trinkets and reuse as much litter as possible.

Panning for Cat Shit

Panning for Cat Shit

Seeing as how Doc is Chinese, I suppose the cat should be glad it gets such exceptional treatment. After all, it could be much worse.

The other white meat.

The other white meat.

Which Way Did I Go?

Posted in Bullshit, Duh, Humor, Oddities, Travels on December 9th, 2009 by Atlas Cerise

Afishionados,

On my way to Cincinnati this morning, I felt as though I had temporarily lost my way for a bit. It was almost as if I couldn’t remember who I was, what I was doing, or how I got there. The NPR program on the radio… Had I heard it before? Strange that so many things felt familiar, and yet brand new at the same time. Fortunately, everything came swirling back to me and I regained cognition after just a few miles on the highway. How odd…

Which Way Did I Go?

Which Way Did I Go?

Nun the Miser

Posted in Duh, Humor, Poetry, Religion on December 5th, 2009 by Atlas Cerise
Nun the Miser

Nun the Miser

The party’d already begun.

But Sally was not having fun.

She’d asked for a toy

That she’d hoped to enjoy

But instead ended up getting nun.

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Come One, Come All!

Posted in Australia, Awesome, Buddies, Bullshit, Holidays, Humor, Insanity, Nasty, Oddities, Plugs, Poetry, Rasputin on December 2nd, 2009 by Atlas Cerise

Afishionados,

Come as many times as you can!

Come one, come all! Come as many times as you can!

A penile poetic threat looms…

The inmates escaped from white rooms!

They’ve chewed their restraints

And caused many complaints

From the Rev on the day of our doom.

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