The Raccoon Gets the Last Laugh
Afishionados,
Birds are Enemy El Numero Uno here at Old Fish and Lemonade, no doubt about it. It seems, however, that there is a challenger to the title.
Remember my post about Herbie and the raccoon? Well, it seems I may have been wrong to award Herbie “1″ and the raccoon “0″. I’d go back and change it, but that would imply that I’m wrong and I just can’t have that. There are no mistakes or falsities here on the Fish, only lesser truths.
It’s taken more than a year, but Herbie has just recently started making a strange noise in the front passenger wheel well. It seems that the tire is now rubbing against something. Something that will cost $80 to fix.
“It looks like you hit a curb or something” said the VW mechanic. I can assure you that Herbie, though quite robust and well known for speeding and cutting people off, has never, ever been over a curb. The only possible culprit? The goddam Raccoon of Doom from North Carolina. Bastard!
May 19th, 2007 at 11:47 am
That must be one big raccoon. Is there another driver in you world that also drives Herbie?
May 19th, 2007 at 1:59 pm
Grandpa got a coon. He made a hat out of it. It is in his basement. Now THAT’S payback.
May 19th, 2007 at 4:39 pm
Hmm. Those red eyes look familiar…
May 22nd, 2007 at 10:08 am
Now you see why the Transoformers didn’t want a new Beetle.
I run over a prairie dog once that got jammed into my wheel well. He just sort of wedged himself in and rubbed against my tire for about ten miles before I noticed the stench of offal.
Critters get their revenge.
May 22nd, 2007 at 1:07 pm
Cruise missiles.
I want some.
They are great for those masked bastards.
I once had to fight one for my life and barely escaped.
Trash eating monsters, all of them.
May 22nd, 2007 at 1:22 pm
Sirdar: I’m pretty sure that it was a raccoon. Truth be told, it could have been a mastadon. Hard to tell when you’re going 100 MPH in the dark of night. And yes, my wife occasionally drives Herbie.
Anaglyph: I could use Glitch’s help to kill it, if you’re offering.
Casey: New Beetle or not, Bumblebee should NOT be whatever the hell he is in the movie. It just means that GM paid Hollywood big bucks to make a 2 hour advertisement for their cars. I stand by what I said before: The movie WILL suck.
Redroach: Will cruise missles work on birds as well?