Monday!
Afishionados,
I’ve just been given the greatest possible news! I am so excited that I think I’ll use an exclamation mark at the end of every sentence in this post! Yes, you read it correctly, every single one!
Not too long ago, four sailors were killed in a terrible car crash! Fast forward to last Friday when the Captain himself gave a speech about drinking and driving! That same weekend, on Saturday night, three idiots from firewatch get DUI’s! But wait, it gets better! Last night, three more idiots also get three DUI’s!
Now, on Monday, instead of getting the day off like I was supposed to, I get to come in for DUI and wreckless driving training ALL DAY! WOW! And that’s not all! I get to come in for the training even though I don’t drink and drive! Isn’t that awesome?! Don’t you wish you could be so lucky, too?!
I’m so enthralled at the thought of this that I think I have shat my shorts! Now, if you’ll excuse me, I’m going to drink a case of Budweiser and get behind the wheel of my car to see how fast it will go! After all, if I have to go to the training, I should have some experience with the subject matter, right?!
FTN!
October 12th, 2006 at 6:46 pm
of course a few idiots always spoil everything for the rest of us….I feel your pain–I really do:(
October 12th, 2006 at 6:52 pm
on second thought, you should take the case of beer with you after having drunk a case, and volunteer to demonstrate just how dangerous drinking and driving can be….you know how they always ask for people to volunteer at these “training/awareness” sessions…at the very least, it will make the day more interesting!..
oh yeah, and a heads up…the buddy system will be implemented soon…and they’ll probably call it something cheesy like they did at our last AF base…i.e. “be a good wingman and don’t forget the 3/60 rule!”
Bottoms up!!!
October 12th, 2006 at 8:41 pm
Shat em, huh?
Is zat simple past?
Whats past perfeckt, then?
Oh, yeah. Done shat em.
October 13th, 2006 at 5:58 am
FTN when they send you to pedophile and homosexual classes. Look at the bright side, at least you are getting paid to sit through the “class.”
October 13th, 2006 at 8:21 am
“Shat My Shorts” has just been added to my extensive lexicon and phraseism collection.
Thanks Jedi!
October 13th, 2006 at 10:21 am
Just tell them in no uncertain terms they’re driving the wrong behavior. I’m sure you’ll get a fair hearing.
October 13th, 2006 at 12:04 pm
I shat, therefore, I am.
October 19th, 2006 at 12:02 am
Just you wait until someone gets busted for driving while enjoying a hit of LSD. That class will be quite fun.