I spent a couple days this week with my stepsister and her 3 year old son and her new baby girl. I had a good time, but I noticed a few things that seem unfair as an adult but are great when you are a kid.

For example: Bella is just two weeks old. When she’s done feeding, someone pats her on the back until she burps. And when she does burp, everyone cheers her on saying she’s a “big girl” or that she’s done a “good job”. Even if she burps in public, she gets complimented.

When I burp in public, it goes unappreciated. And not only can I burp, but I can do it without anyone patting me on the back to help. That’s right, I can do it all by myself. Yet no one cheers. How sad this make me feel.

Austin (the three year old) is going through “potty training”. He’s got his own little kiddy-shitter and everything. It’s more high tech than a real toilet, too. It has a light and a piss-shield to prevent unwanted urinary casualties.

Anyway, once he’s done, Austin likes to exlaim that he’s “gone to the potty!”. When he successfully goes to the potty, he also gets candy as a reward to encourage good behaviour. Well whoopty doo! And I don’t even need a piss shield. When I announced that I, too, had gone to the potty all by myself, no one seemed to care. Instead of cheering and congratulating, there was much protesting over a theoretical stench emanating from the bathroom. It seems rather unfair to criticize me when the wee child smells up the bathroom just as badly. And no one gives me candy, either.

I don’t know when the things you do as a kid become unacceptable as an adult. But I came into this world naked, and I plan to leave it the same way. Mark my words…

This entry was posted on Friday, June 9th, 2006 at 2:09 am and is filed under Family, Observations, Oddities. You can follow any responses to this entry through the RSS 2.0 feed. You can skip to the end and leave a response. Pinging is currently not allowed.