If the title of this post were true, then the guy I sat next to for 12 long hours today would be in for a real treat.

First off, let me explain to you that nothing I do at work (at least right now) is the least bit entertaining. There is nothing of interest to anyone who’s even remotely sane. Believe me, it’s very dry.

That being said, you tend to notice certain little quirks about people since you spend 12 hours with them in the same building with absolutely no windows to the outside world. I sit in between two people, a close friend of mine to my left and another guy to my right, who I firmly believe escaped from a genetically experimental sasquatch zoo. I’ll just refer to him as “L”.

There are three parts to the nuclear training program, and L. was in my second portion and followed along for the third. (Thankfully, I did not have him for the first part.) I never paid much attention to him while were together in the second stage because he sat up front on the other side of the room. We just never interacted.

And all that changed today. I happened to notice what he was doing and ultimately decided that God was punishing me. I looked over to my right and discovered L. was picking his nose something fierce. I’m not talking about a casual itch, or even a “Hey, non one’s looking so I’m gonna go for this little booger here that’s been giving me a fit”. No, those could at least be understood if not condoned. L. had set up an entire excavation. He must have been searching for the Lost Ark of the Covenant, Jimmy Hoffa’s briefcase, China, or the cure for cancer. And, after studying him for a few moments, I discovered that he was casually placing his archaeological treasures beneath the tabletop, this ensuring their safety for future generations to unveil and discover.

But it gets better.

A few more hours (though it felt like days) I happened to catch L. scrathing and picking the pimples on his back and face. He was squirting his backne right next to me. Unfortunately, my stomach could not take it any longer, and thus, I cannot account for the ultimate location of the little white inserts that undoubtedly escaped his filthy little pores.

Tomorrow I will attempt to move to a different part of the room. Somewhere, anywhere.

This entry was posted on Tuesday, November 15th, 2005 at 7:56 pm and is filed under Navy, Observations, Uncategorized. You can follow any responses to this entry through the RSS 2.0 feed. You can leave a response, or trackback from your own site.